The other night I engaged in my favorite procrastination activity: reading other people’s blogs. There is nothing quite as satisfying (except maybe chocolate) as ignoring the laundry or the disaster that is my office so I can find out how someone else dealt with the same challenge.
While surfing, I found: Staying Sane as a Parent and Business Owner. Hmmm, anyone who’s figured this one out is a genius in my book.
It was written by Peter Vogopoulos, the mostly silent partner of Firepole Marketing. I first came across Firepole Marketing when Danny Iny, the not so silent partner, sent me a link to his book ; “Engagement from Scratch”, a compilation of the real-life stories of 30 successful marketers on how to build a loyal and engaged audience. From that moment, I was pretty much hooked on FM.
In this post, Peter shares how his life — and priorities — as a business owner changed after he and his wife had a baby. He had to give some stuff up, take a supporting role instead of a starring one, and find new ways to work. He was juggling a lot of balls and trying really, really hard not to drop the glass ones. These are the ones that are the most precious, the ones that when all is said and done, are the only ones that really matter.
I love this. How many times do we give the same level of importance to everything that’s on our priority list ; and then end up feeling like crap because we missed our kid’s baseball game so we could meet a deadline?
This post resonated with me in many ways. In 2011, I was laid off. I took that as the proverbial kick in the pants I needed to start Studio 4 PR, the business I’d been dreaming of for years. I was thrilled that I’d be working from home. Our then 5-year-old was starting kindergarten in the fall and this meant I could volunteer in his class and make sure he got on and off the bus safely.
I also had visions that I would be a cross between the Wonder Women of Productivity and Macguyver, accomplishing far more between the hours of 9:00 a.m. and 3:00 p.m. than I ever had in my previous 40-hour life and, with two candy bars, a piece of string and a rubber band, also able to whip up a Halloween costume, get dinner on the table, and clean the house. So, it was a little disheartening to have my husband come home from work, see the house a wreck and the laundry not done and ask “What did you do all day?
The fact that I’d been spending hours upon hours on a client project, attending a networking event, or helping out in our son’s class didn’t seem to matter. He wanted me to “show him the money”.
Heck, I want to show him the money, too, but I also want to be like Peter and make sure I don’t drop any of the glass balls.
What about you? What are you juggling? Feel free to comment below.
Thank you for sharing this space with me.
Robin Taney, (aka the “Get R.E.A.L Girl”) is the owner and founder of Studio 4 PR . She works with creative, independent, and “kitchen table” entrepreneurs who are highly motivated to be found by their perfect client. You can connect with her on Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, and Pinterest, and sign up for her newsletter, Get R.E.A.L. You are welcome to use this post on your blog, provided you do not alter it in any way and include a link to this blog.
Oh yes, I too remember the Wonder Woman years … the mornings when a tearful 7 year old wondered why her favorite pink sweatshirt was still in the wash … the end of day lunch box returned with the dill pickle I had lovingly packed with the peanut butter and banana sandwich. Now my challenge was how to be CEO (Chief in charge of everything officer) in my solopreneur role, new (second) wife and full time STEPmother in the early days of such family constellations. True I wasn’t tasked with an infant and all that entails but I had my hands full.
A book with a title like ‘How to do less and be loved more’ helped me to pare down the overwhelming list of obligations I had shouldered. That may not have been the title as a search of Amazon doesn’t find it but I am sure you get the point.
Let’s assume that the most important thing in life is to love and be loved. A read through the Five Love Languages will help you identify ways to give those you love what they need and how to guide them to give you what you need. And let the rest go!
While I had been raised to make the bed, fold the laundry, cook the meals, wash the dishes, mend the torn clothes … here’s a few things I learned:
1. My husband preferred to leave the bed “open” to the air.
2. He did not mind folding his own socks and underwear.
3. He liked cleaning up the kitchen after dinner.
4. Mending children’s clothing is a losing proposition – shop at Value Village.
5. Children will feel empowered when they can do their own laundry.
6. Making your own lunch can be fun and educational when you are in Grade 2.
And equipped with this knowledge, I was able to give myself a break – focus on what’s really important and throw off the Wonder Woman role.
Hope this helps!
Anne
Hi Anne,
What a great perspective! It’s comforting to know that we don’t have to be perfect in order to be thought of as perfect by our families.
I love “Love Languages”. It’s one of my favorite books and always thought of it with regards to my husband, but now, thanks to you, I’m going to put it to work on my 7-year-old.
Thank you for sharing, Anne!
Best,
Robin
I can sure relate to balancing alot of balls in the air. I find myself looking out the window on a beautiful day saying “I must take a walk and enjoy this day.” However, by the time I’m through with my work at home, it’s too late and another day goes by. If we knew our life would end tomorrow, I don’t think any one of us would say, “I’m sure glad I finished that report” I think I’m going to push my work aside and take a nice long walk …TODAY!
Hi Louise,
I’m glad my post made you realize how important it is to take time to slow down and step back. I hope you make time to take that walk every day!
Thanks for sharing!
Best,
Robin
What a nice piece, Robin, in support of kitchen table entrepreneurs, who, by their very nature, are pushing big rocks up tall hills, all on their own.
The rest of the world may not see how much ground needs to be tilled to produce a crop. We are judged merely by our crops.
Only you and God know how many miles you traveled to get a single door opened, or how many mounds of minutiae you had to shovel to get your website up and running … still your crops are the proof of the pudding.
So we need to have patience with the rest of the world. Smile. Pray. And contentedly keep pushing those rocks.
SQuire Rushnell
Hi SQuire,
Thank you for such an awesome reminder. You are so right. We need to have patience with the rest of the world, smile, and pray.
I am honored that you took the time to share your thoughts with me. I am a huge fan of your When God Winks books.
Best,
Robin